It was fun.
Then just shortly before bed it became a messed up and slightly hopeful (I'm beginning to hate hope) confusionfest.
Sit down son, and let me tell you a tale.
I went for supper with post-love-interest/new-best-friend/i-think girl, and she got me The Garden State, which was great because we'd talked about watching it back in April and never did, so it was a thoughtful gift. We watched it at her house.
SO. I go on MSN, and shortly she asks for a ride... I'm like... sure... so I give her a ride into the city (whatever, like 15 minutes) and drop her off, she tells me it's her (four days together asshole who ditched her all three times they've had plans) boyfriend's place, and she's there to get the sweater she left there and end it (for obvious reasons). He isn't home, we go to 7-Eleven to grab something to drink, I take her home.
Back on MSN, we're talking, and after she says (to me) "I wish you were here to do my back" and suchlike, I don't recall how I responded but I think it was along the lines of "if I didn't have to work tomorrow morning I'd be leaving again", and then when I tell her I need to get to bed, as a goodnight she says "I love you babe". We'd said it before a couple times, I responded in kind... it's just a very strange situation, and I really need to talk to her. The open-endedness of all of this is driving me insane. I mean, it's been only 4 days since that dreaded call, and I still feel the same about her, and clearly her about me, but I don't even know if she's actually ended it with jerk-man yet.... It's rather crazy. I really need to clear this up with her. Wish me luck.
Yeah, I'm still totally interested in her. I don't expect that to sound sane to anyone. It probably isn't.
She may be testing you to see if some things have changed favorably in the relationship.
I don't mean to sound uncaring but I cannot remember how you two seperated but obviously both of you are still a little vulnerable towards the interests of the other and if she accepts the seperation but still wishes for your friendship, that must mean that she likes much about you and perhaps still hopes for improvements in other areas.
I have lost only about a dozen relationship and had some regret in that loss nearly every time; even when I ended it.
Maybe just try to relax and not be too hopeful unless you do want to take control and you want her closer to you again. She may be just as insecure and confused as you about any relationship between the two of you.
Or I could be wrong and she is just manipulating you for her own ego to boost her esteem somehow.
Jerk-man is in fact the reason we are not "together". It was a pretty deep yet still unofficial sort of relationship-thing, and then he asked her out and she said yes.... even when shes called to tell me this she said "I still love you". The day before that, everything between us was more or less normal. That was only a week ago. I still don't think they've spent any time together, in the first week, yet today will be the fourth time I see her since then.
So I think I'm just going to ask, in a no-pressure and tell the absolute truth, maybe take some time before you answer kind of way, what's going on.
Because it was very sudden and though we're very close friends, I definitely want to be close to her in that way again.
ADDENDUM: And close friends it seems we shall remain, at least for the time being.
Thank you all for the birthday greetings, I wish I'd been less of a miserable bastard in receiving them.
Happy birthday Eric! Hope it's a good one.
Happy birthday Eric. <3
lets celebrate on the 14th? =P
